This dating life: 7 thoughts you have when you start dating someone new

When we meet someone new and feel a connection there are a variety of thoughts that cross our minds. It can be exciting and nerve-racking all at the same time. But if someone has brought those good butterflies to your tummy then these are just a few of the crazy thoughts we all fall victim too.

1. Crap, how did I start liking this person?
How did one coffee date turn into me having feelings for someone who was a stranger just two weeks ago? These are thoughts that happen to all of us when we start seeing someone new. Somehow, going on three dates is enough time to determine whether or not they’re a keeper.

2. Do they even like me.
We spend so much of our time wondering how we feel about this other person we can forget to take their feelings into consideration. You begin reminding yourself that they haven’t said anything directly to you about their feelings. Maybe they mentioned how cute you looked he other night. Is that the same thing? And then you remind yourself about the magical kiss you shared together that one night. And all the other kisses that followed that ended up being just as magical.

3. Would they get along with my friends.
Friends play a huge role in who we date. We need to make sure that everyone gets along so it’s not weird when you throw a Super Bowl party and invite both sets of fiends. They don’t have to be best friends or anything but they should be able to get along with your friends.

4. Is it too soon to take a picture together.
After being single for so long (4 years to be exact), I’ve seen my Facebook news feed littered with couple photos. And if I’m being totally honest, I want my own couple photo to share. But how do I bring this up to my new guy? Like how would I even justify taking my phone out and snapping a picture together? What would I say? “Oh hey, look here, I need to take a picture so I can prove to everyone that I’m no longer single or antisocial”?

5. Oh man, I feel safe.
As someone who keeps her heart guarded and protected at all times, it takes a certain special someone to allow me to open my heart to someone new. When I’m able to move past just the physical attraction of someone and begin learning about who they really are, their values, their ambitions, their likes and dislikes, I begin opening up myself. Slowly, like an onion, my layers get peeled back and I allow myself to become vulnerable. To let this new person see sides of me that I hide from the outside world.

When you are able to be vulnerable with someone new, it’s inevitable that crazy thoughts pop into your head. Like how does my name sound with theirs? Why aren’t they texting me back? Did I say something stupid? At the same time, as you become more and more vulnerable you will begin to really question the seriousness of the relationship.

6. Do they think it’s getting serious.
Is it all in our heads or is this real life? Will this completely burn in the end or is there some actual potential for love? Do I really want to put my heart out on the line? Yes, the answer is always yes! If you never try you’ll never learn. People come in and out of our lives all the time. They are there to teach us various lessons that we are here on this earth to learn. Every relationship is its own teacher. So dive in, head first into the land of potential.

7. Text or snapchat?
These days it’s hard to keep track of all the various social media avenues out there. If he texts you about plans, can you respond with a sexy snapchat of yourself? If he sends you a snapchat of himself do you have to respond in the same way? All of this is to say that it really doesn’t matter. If you two are into each other it won’t matter whether you sent a snap to his text or vice versa. As long as you two are communicating with one another then all the crazy thoughts are just our own minds playing dirty tricks on us.

And when you are finally able to send that makeup free snap or better yet, see them in person without any makeup, you’ll know that it’s getting real. So get ready for all the feels. I’ll be here to share them all with you!

As it turns out, dating is f***ing exhausting. But the only way to find love is to keep doing this whole dating thing.

Now I’d love to hear from all of you. What sort of crazy thoughts run through your mi d whe. You begin dating someone new? Please share in the comments below. As always, I love reading all your comments and feedback!

Edited and published on Elite Daily.


A 20-something girl on a journey to find herself with hopes of helping others feel their feelings.