This week I turned 27. Some see that as young, others may see it as too old. Well, I just see it as a number. I’ve never been one to care about age. I’ve always been told that I look younger than I am while simultaneously acting more mature than my number age.
Birthdays serve as a time of reflection. I’m lucky that mine comes in the middle of the calendar year. It gives me the opportunity to check in with myself. Where have I made progress and grown in my life? And where do I still have some work to do?
So if you so choose, please join me as I explore this past year.
Love is all around me, all the time.
There have been times in my life when I’ve felt unloveable. Whether it happened because my crush in 6th grade said I had cooties or whether it was because I was desperate for my grandfathers acceptance as a child. Whatever it was, I grew up thinking that there were only certain people who were deserving of love. And I wasn’t one of them. I thought I needed to change in order to find love. And so began the tumultuous journey of finding myself. From drinking away my feelings, to over or under eating my feelings, I ran from love. Because I didn’t think I was worthy of it. Now, I have done a lot of work on myself. Talked to a therapist. Journaled. Let all my feelings soar and what I found was that I had been sabotaging myself. The love I had always wanted and craved was always there. It had been hiding within me this whole time. This past year I realized that I am worthy of love. Not only am I worthy, but I can give it to myself. I don’t need it from others.
At the same time, I’ve also been able to receive love when it is given to me. After thinking that I’m not worthy, I pushed people away who were just there to give me love. And so I’ve embraced it. I now openly and freely share love with others and allow love in.
I’ve found my passion.
After college I struggled in my career path. I wasn’t quite sure what I really wanted to do. Lost in finding my purpose and passion. Until this past year when I launched this fabulous baby thisblanklife.com. It’s been such a joy to put my heart and soul into something I truly care about. Creating content for all of you to read. And then having the great opportunity to contribute to Elite Daily has really inspired me and pushed me to continue on this writing path. Wherever it may lead me. But to finally be able to feel like I love something that can be a career is such a load off of my busy mind.
I am enough
Not only has this past year taught me about my strength, resiliency, and self-love. I’ve learned that I am simply enough. Exactly as I am. I’ve made peace with my imperfections. Learned to embrace them. Love every last flaw. Because as we live in a society that promotes a single standard of beauty. It can be really hard to be okay with your uniqueness especially when you may not fit society’s mold of beauty.
This past year has been wonderful. I’ve been blessed with health, love and inspiration. I am constantly surrounded by love. I have a mom and dad who are my biggest cheerleaders. I’m just here walking my journey, allowing the universe to guide me. And that feeling of slowly letting go of controlling outcomes in my life has allowed the universe to bring me opportunities and experiences that have been way bigger and even more than anything I could have dreamed of. So the biggest lesson that I come away with is that life is a beautiful journey filled with ups and downs, and it’s always beneficial for our growth to allow ourselves to fully experience all of our feelings as they come. Embracing them, not being ashamed of having emotions. And as always, feel your feelings. They will never steer you wrong!
As always, I love hearing from all of you. Please leave your comments and feedback below!
Have a wonderful week!